ACCORDING to the Department of Imaginary Statistics, about four squillion
hours were lost to the UK workplace last year in production, due to the peasantry taking sick days.
You might think the new mobile phone is a bargain but you won't be so happy when the only thing that arrives in the post is a credit card bill for a squillion
quid and your identity has been sold to a criminal gang in Eastern Europe.
But next time she trots out the pathetic old "I'm just an ordinary girl" line, someone might want to point out that while her dad gave her a squillion
pound trust fund, he forgot to pass on a whole host of other valuable assets, including modesty, discretion and humility.
99, which have such punchy pigments they're like wearing a squillion
pixels on your lips.
Businessmen couldn't close a thousand, million, squillion
pound deal unless they had one.
Result, productivity (I know, an alien concept in PR) up by a squillion
per cent and there are far fewer Berocca runs to Boots in the mornings.
While we can see instantly the appeal of earning a squillion
pounds for hoofing a pig's bladder around a park for 90 minutes a week, your average professional footballer would be at a loss to grasp why some people are prepared to part with hard cash for the privilege of travelling to Hartlepool in a clapped-out supporters' club minibus with a pack of obsessive, gibbering loons.
It's like paying a squillion
dollars to build a mansion in a rainforest.
Some faces and poses are familiar -- Hemingway out hunting pheasant, Pollock splattering a canvas, Peggy Guggenheim preening in a sumptuous Poiret gown (and turban designed by Stravinsky's wife), George Washington looking stern and statesmanlike, an image repeated on a squillion
The council proudly claimed that it has bought three squillion
tons of rock salt and grit to avoid the nonsense of last winter where some areas became impassable.
Suppose someone's emailed to take out a squillion
pound option and takes my lack of response to mean I don't care?
Ten million billion squillion
roubles invested for no return.