They speak to the child in us all, and especially to the child who has holidayed in rented caravans, has been scrumping in the inner-city and has hung around on their flat balcony while the April showers have hammered down around them.
Collecting nuts and mushrooms, scrumping apples and fishing, using lead weights made from toy soldiers melted down in an old pan on the kitchen stove while Mum was out.
OWNERS MYSTIFIED AS ENTIRE ORCHARD IS CLEARED OF FRUIT IN SCRUMPING SPREE AN ancient orchard has been entirely stripped of fruit in a "mysterious" scrumping spree.
But then when the majority of your party members are middle-class pensioners who envisage a perfect Britain as one of cricket on village greens, maidens riding on bikes, boys scrumping apples and women knowing their place, then why not try to take them there?
At that time, beating Southampton 5-0 was a rite of passage, like getting drunk on your dad's cheap brandy, or scrumping apples to get into the school gang.
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