Simon wants someone who speaks like a text message to appeal to Da Yoof
, as I'm sure the X Factor audience these days can't remember which girl band Cheryl Cole was in, much less why she is still held in enough regard to judge talent.
With her 68th birthday on December 27, the former Yoof
TV boss - who brought us Red Dwarf, Network 7 and DEF II - is currently venting on Loose Women.
Glue has more of a chance of staying the trip, and it was obvious within minutes of Monday night's debut that the targeted audience is your typical youngish E4 crowd, the type who watch other British yoof
dramas on the channel like My Mad Fat Diary, Fresh Meat and Skins.
Although pitched at the younger generation, (hence the annoyingly goofy sketches that Tyger interjects with), if you're parents of teenagers wanting to get a handle on what yoof
really think, this is eye-opening viewing.
IT'S easy to scoff, sniff and dismiss BBC Three with its yoof
programin' innit blud and its ill-advisedly blunt programme titles.
It made me very glad that I live in Bahrain and, as a result, I've yet to see a single yoof
wearing a hoodie and standing menacingly on a corner here in the kingdom.
the vacuous, ubiquitous catchphrase of today's yoof
- something even worse comes along.
But it's a sad day when a food documentary, albeit one first shown on yoof
channel BBC3, does little more than play for laughs.
Even Derek Thompson, who knew it's a premier UK music award, ruined any chance he had of being accepted as cool by da yoof
It's always yoof
speak, stuff such as YOLO and LOL - very much of their time and redundant/ annoying by the time the book is printed.
De p'leese don't respec' and interact wiv da yoof
, man," said one, words greeted with journalistic reverence.
The killing was plotted using the modern-day tools of yoof