Wearing too many pieces at once will only leave you - and everyone else - square-eyed
Bond director Sam Mendes has brought Roald Dahl's Wonka up to date, turning square-eyed
brat Mike Teavee into a computer-game addict and Violet Beauregarde into a gum-munching LA rapper.
But even the sun would not keep me outdoors from 4pm though, as the best of TV was about to begin and I would sit square-eyed
for the next few hours to Grumpian.
Yes, nowadays I am enjoying such items and computers but how fortunate I was to enjoy a childhood full of the activities The National Trust is trying to realise again for our sheltered generation of square-eyed
youngsters staring at one screen or another.
Brummies spent more than two months of last year glued to their TV sets, according to a report published today.
The app, from Newcastle-based Shout Digital, gives square-eyed
TV buffs access to a bottomless pit of information on programmes past and present, the actors that starred in them and episode plot-lines.
The latest action plan in persuading our square-eyed
munchkins to step away from their computers and go and play outside.
The survey by energy firm Npower found that square-eyed
youngsters aged seven to 16 spend a shocking four months a year - staring at screens.
The sheer numbers of sheep in UK, and the logistical nightmare this type of electronic surveillance would cause, outweighs any practical benefits deluded square-eyed
bureaucrats in Belgium can dream up.
To be honest I'd stopped reading those scare-mongering reports that we're creating a generation of square-eyed
uncommunicative dead-legs, reasoning that 50 years ago the same fears were expressed about the cinema and 20 years ago it was the telly causing us all to stroke our chins in concern.
The sensible ones got on with their life but the hard-core addicts cracked open the six packs and the Pringles and settled down for what is the most nerve-jangling night of the square-eyed
Yes, none of the home nations have made it to the summer's European Championship finals, but there is a whole host of Earth-shattering sporting events to keep even the most square-eyed
of fanatics entertained.